: Went to a fairly local Ace Hardware. I was told there is a
: different requirement for the solids per million parts of what
: not for all finishes where I live--LA. According to the
: salesman, it is a different product if I drive to another
: county.

So cross the county line, and make sure you drive a fast getaway car.

Ever consider forming a religion based on sniffing paint fumes? It wouldn't be much different than any faith which uses incense, peyote, or marijuana as part of their practice.
I think the Universal Life Church is still around. If not, there are plenty of other mail-order places which will ordain you as a minister in their open-practice faith. I think you just need to have regular meetings and a congregation of at least 4 members. Make it an online church of boatbuilding and varnishing and you could cite this group as members.

Line the aisles with sawdust. Order of service would be preliminary prayers on ordering plans. A prayer for absolution before ripping expensive lumber into tiny strips. Prayers for epoxying would be repeated twice-once for each major coat. The Navy hymn would provide a regular musical/choir piece. The prayer for a successful launch would be: 'Oh. What a rock we have in thee, and I hope I leave it in my lee"

Then get a religious waiver, or a special exemption from the county. I'm sure they would rather grant one license than fight you and the ACLU up to the Supreme Court

: And who is willing to ship me some bootleg good stuff to Calif?

Well, during prohibition they used to allow wine for religious purposes, and hard liquor for medical reasons--so if you can't get varnish for religious reasons, see if you can invent a medical reason. Maybe you need it to avoid withdrawal pains. Heck, we all know boatbuilding is addictive behavior.

Anyhow, good luck with your venture. And if all else fails, try the low VOC stuff. It might impress you.

PGJ